What to expect the night of your wedding

Aug 17, 2017 | Planning

Today we're dishing on a seldom discussed, although frequently thought about, topic: what to expect the night of your wedding with your new hubby (hey! OR wifey!)...


You spend all day getting ready, looking as radiant as ever. You wear your sweetest lace robe in the morning, while sipping bubbly with your girls and fantasizing about meeting your groom at the altar. Just prior to getting dressed, you slip on your prettiest, laciest under garments and sheer bralette. Just kidding... you're planning to put your tightest Spanx on or go full-commando, let's be real.

So, what is the tradition of "consumating" the wedding? According to good old Wikipedia, 'in many traditions and statutes of civil or religious law, the consummation of a marriage, often called simply consummation, is the first (or first officially credited) act of sexual intercourse between two people, either following their marriage to each other or after a prolonged romantic attraction.' We like that little addition there, "first officially credited".

So many things play into how your night will go:

Are you a virgin? Have you two already had sex prior? Do you already live together? Have you talked about this special part of the night? Are you leaving for your honeymoon right away? Do you have a hotel room, suite, or special place to spend the night? Are you nervous? Do you plan to head to your room right after your reception - or stay out for a bit with your guests? Point is: there are so many variables that makes it hard to give advice.


1. First of all, don't hype it up too much. We all know that stress or pressure can cause things to.. ahem.. not function properly. Or on the flip side, stress or pressure can cause things to feel... not as great as they could. #amirite?

If you've never been intimate with each other prior, we're just going to go ahead and advise that you perhaps wait until the next day. No shame in getting some shut eye and going at it once you're feeling more rested and less full of champagne.

If you've been intimate before, pressure should be off! Think of this as the MOST special time you'll have with each other all evening and truly focus on each other. Don't let unrealistic expectations cloud your quality time with your new love.

2. Rock those Spanx, girl: we know you want your booty looking as good as possible in that form fitting gown! When you arrive at your hotel room, have your hubby help you unzip or unbutton your gown, but head to the bathroom to freshen up and change into something a little "breezier". Splash on some of your wedding day perfume, wash your wedding makeup off (your new husband will just love you au naturale), and don't worry about the fifteen million bobby pins in your hair. You can remove those tomorrow!

3. With so many honorable differences of opinions on intimacy prior to and the night of your wedding, our next tip is to keep hush hush about your activities. Don't kiss and tell because you may make someone feel uncomfortable and above all, you should respect the privacy of your new husband or wife. You can, however, pull a girlfriend aside and ask her any intimate questions you have!

In closing, we simply want to bring this issue to the table. We'd LOVE to hear your thoughts, stories (good or bad!), and answer any questions if you have them. Pop them into the comments below!

What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
Bridal Boudoir Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
Bridal boudoir Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
Bridal Boudoir Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it
What to expect the night of your wedding Pin it

From Jeanni Dunagan: "Bridal boudoir tells a story. One that intimately captures the elegant sensuality of a bride as she prepares herself on her wedding day. A story that begins before she slips on her gown and that leads her into a new chapter. This elegant bridal boudoir session at Sunstone Villa features delicate textures of silk, tulle and lace that embody femininity. Flirtatious glances, sensual smiles and suggestive curves inspire a simultaneous sense of wistful longing and empowered confidence."

Vendor Details

Photographer: Jeanni Dunagan | Film Lab: Richard Photo Lab | Stylist / Planner: Kelly Oshiro | Dress Designer: Jennifer Gifford | Venue: Sunstone Villa | Hair & Makeup Artist: Janet Villa | Veil: Untamed Petals | Slippers: Bella Belle | Delicates + Mask: Journelle | Bodysuit: Hanky Panky | Robe: Flora Nikrooz


Koustav De - 22 August 2017

We have gone real part to be virgin till tha date of marriage. Reports suggest the rate is even falling dratically. Marriage gives a courtship the legitimacy it longs for, it gives a social veil and legal substantiality.

Quality and aesthetically the photos are pleasing and of top quality. Jeanni Dunagan , good work.

Fiona - 17 August 2017

Our wedding night was not the most romantic by far! After such a long day all we wanted was to wash off the day and climb into bed and eat Cheetos as we hadn’t really eaten properly! A bit of an anti climax (no pun intended) but it was just great to unwind and get some rest. Besides, it’s what the honeymoon is for right?! ;)

Madison - 17 August 2017

Though I am unmarried myself, one of my favorite wedding day pieces of advice I’ve been given was from my cousin.  When she married her husband, they had lived together and traveled the world together and had a fully established intimate relationship.  The night of their wedding, they opted out of celebrating post-reception with family and friends and instead picked up a bottle of champagne and relaxed with their feet up on their hotel balcony, overlooking the ocean and toasting to their new marriage as they reminisced about their favorite parts of the day.  I don’t believe they ever “got intimate” that night but she says to this day that it was the best night of her life.

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